A Wasted Education?

There seems to be an ongoing theme lately about higher education being a waste because people end up with more debt in the United States than they actually make in income. This perception of education being a waste is hard to argue with when it is true that many of us who have gone to college end up with a huge debt. I am still paying my undergraduate loan 10+ years later, not to mention my graduate school education. It is sad.

But, I view it as an investment. I enjoyed my time at both institutions. And, in fact, sometimes I think of returning again one day. But, it is true that it is very hard not to fall into the negative thought processes of “why did I go to school to work for so little to do so much at work.” The responsibilities at work often do not match the pay. Teachers can attest to this, as well as social workers, correctional officers, and so on.

But despite this economic darkness, we (the United States) are somehow still doing alright. We are somehow, still afloat. We are surviving. And, to those of you who have invested time and money in a higher education institute, have faith that at some point you will see a return on investment. And, if you don’t see the benefits of what you have labored for, take a step back and rethink your plan. How are you going to change your life to shape it into how you really want to live? This is where I am at…rethinking the plan.

Stinky Undergrads

Beer sweat permeates the room. Is there a keg in here?  Impossible in a room designed for undergraduate students, most not of legal age to drink.

I scan. Ping pong, foosball, and air hockey tables are cluttered in the front corner of the building. I wonder if one of the students will challenge me to a game of air hockey. A large flat screen TV is hanging from the wall in front of a nest of newly arrived freshmen. In the background, a hip-hop song rocks the beat, and I begin to shift attempting to resist the urge to move with the “bom bom bom.” I scan, again.

I set up my table amidst other clubs and organizations. My attempt to say hello to passersby is met with awkward stiff walks, shoulders hunched and eyes locked straight down. You can’t see me their body language screams. I persevere and manage to draw in some of the lone ducks with a tempting treat. In the nest, they giggle, flirt, and fall all over each other as if they were playing amidst a large bouncy castle. I guess for them, the sofa and this room is just that, a place for them to let loose in an up and coming adult world.

The room crowded with young adults, and I am the intruder. I am the suit. I am the grown-up they will rebel against because after all, they just broke free from their jails of high school and home. But, I am still young. I tell myself. I can fit in, can’t I?

It is then that I realize…I am “old.” I am going to have a tough time settling into their nest.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Legacy

I want to leave this world knowing I have done something fabulous! I want to be a part of something REALLY big and I want to be able to give back financially to those who have helped me along the way.

I believe in timing…this, was something that was taught to me by someone in my youth, but nevertheless, it is real. Timing really is everything and knowing that has sustained me thus far.

WE create our own anxiety and pressure that things have to happen now…but slow and steady wins the race. I will leave this world with many regrets, disappointments, and possibly with some people shouting, thank God she’s gone. But, in reality, I also believe that I will leave this world with many fulfilled hearts, joyful memories established, and opportunities.

But, how? Some might look at my life thus far and say, you already fulfilled many of those hopes and dreams, but from my perspective, I am not even close. How again will I get there? I don’t know. There has to be a way. And, in time, I will make it to where I want to be and leave this world with a legacy that my family can be proud of regardless of what the media and society deems as worthwhile news.

Next step…negotiating

So I did it!

Yep!

I landed a job. Phew…

In this tough market, it is an absolute bear to be looking for work. Well, the truth is, it’s a bear in any market really. There is so much planning, researching, and preparation involved. After my first interview, I was practically on the couch for five days just trying to recuperate. And then there was a second interview.

So now comes the negotiation stage. I am bound and determined to negotiate. I haven’t really ever done so in the past. The truth is, I didn’t really know how to negotiate and I didn’t know that I should. Men do it all the time. So, why not women?

As I have been processing my negotiating strategy and thinking about my requests, I can’t help but think “Man, I am lucky to have this job; maybe I shouldn’t ask for more money” or “Maybe they will be insulted that I am asking for more” or “I could live with the salary they offered.” The truth is, I have every right to negotiate for a better living just as a man would. I doubt that most men think twice about negotiating for a better offer.

So, after much careful research on negotiating, I have pushed aside my pessimistic whispers and have made a decision; I will negotiate and I will be proud of myself for doing so in the end no matter what the outcome.

 

 

I want to be an expert…

I thought I’d be an expert by now. You know, someone who people turn to and say, “What do you think? You studied this, right?”

But, I’m not. And, if people do happen to turn to me and say, “Hey, you studied this, right?” I generally shy away from the question…”um, yeah, but it’s been a long time.”

Why is it that I shy away? Well, to put it simply, I am not currently working in my field of study. I haven’t for about a year and a half now. Why? Well, because other opportunities were presented to me and I went down a different path.

So, here I am. I have a ton of experience, education, and passion for many different things and I can’t find the right fit. I continue to search for the best type of occupation for me so that I can get back into the role of career woman. But in the meantime, I am stuck wondering what kind of expert do I want to be?

 

Do you believe in luck?

She dropped her husband off at work on Monday. “Have a great day,” she said as he jumped out of the car. “You too,” he replied and shut the door. The start of a rather emotional week, but she didn’t know it yet.

Later that day, she received a phone call from a former employer about a resume she had submitted to a company that he now worked at. Ecstatic about the possibility of being employed again by a reputable organization, she began preparing for her day in the spotlight, the inevitable interview.

Two days went by, and no word from her former employer. She began to contemplate life and the possible career directions she could go. With her husband working late and her son in bed, she began to sulk with a glass of red in hand. One and a half bottles later, she found herself plopped on the couch elated by her faded worries that overwhelmed her throughout the day.

Thursday, awoken by the sounds of her son playing in his crib, head pounding and sadness pressing forcefully upon her heart, she rolled out of bed and stumbled down the hall into the shower. Today, had to be a better day.

She and her son walked to the library, her phone in her pocket awaiting the hopeful vibration of the welcoming call to interview at the reputable organization. They reached the library, only to find that it was not yet open because the hours had changed for the summer. She wandered back down the street towards her home, and found herself at a convenience store. She contemplated purchasing a lotto ticket, but decided it best not to gamble since she never wins and is on a tight budget. She left the store with only a pack of gum and returned home.

Upon returning to her home, she gave her former employer a call but the call went straight to voicemail. She left a message and hung up. “Ah,” she mumbled.

Her husband came home that evening. “Good news,” he said, “I got a second job for the summer. It will give us extra money to help us pay down our debts.” “Great,” she replied. “So don’t worry if you don’t get a job right away,” he said. “OK, I guess,”she sadly expressed, “but, eventually I will need to get something.”

The next day, she was thrilled to hear her phone ring while napping. An incoming call, from the organization she had hoped to work for. She answered. He spoke. “I understand,” she said, “thanks for letting me know.” She hung up clutching the phone to her chest. Now what? She thought to herself.

Her son and she walked back to the convenience store that afternoon. She headed over to the counter for a lotto slip. She paid for the ticket and the clerk told her, “Good luck.” “Thanks,” she answered and then rolled her son back out of the store with her lotto ticket tucked safely in her wallet, hoping for her luck to change. And it did…

Job Search Stress

If the term “job search” were to be listed in the dictionary, it would probably be defined as a time-consuming, stressful activity. As an applicant we put hours into looking for the right jobs, writing cover letters and resumes, and then often having to re-input our information from our resumes into online application systems. Hours. Days. Weeks. Sometimes months go by without a phone call requesting our presence for an interview. It is a laborious act that we all at some point or another have to go through. But that is just it. We all have to go through it at some point.

When I reread my prior two blog posts regarding job searchers I’d overheard at Starbucks, I thought of all of the highs and lows a job searcher experiences.

Step 1: Motivate self to look for job.

Step 2: Watch television. Eat ice cream.

Step 3: Start looking for jobs.

Step 4: Get disappointed at lack of jobs posted. Eat more ice cream.

Step 5: Get excited about a job or jobs that are now being posted.

Step 6: Prepare documents for the application process.

Step 7: Agonize over the prepared documents and make sure that they are pristine and have all of the amazing qualities listed to help you get the job.

Step 8: Anxiously apply.

Step 9: Take a deep breath, relax your shoulders. Eat more ice cream.

Step 10: Wait.

Step 11: Wait.

Step 12: Start applying for other jobs and wait.

Step 13: Begin to worry again. Where’s that ice cream?

And so on and so on until you finally get an interview. Hooray!

So with all the highs and lows that come along with the job search process, I want to say, be patient and be encouraged. You are not alone. Eventually, something will come your way. Then, maybe you will upgrade your ice cream to a toast of champagne.

 

 

Job Search: Scenario 2

At another Starbucks in the neighborhood, I witnessed a job interview being conducted. A gentleman, well dressed in a suit and tie, eagerly sat across from two men discussing his experience as a manager in various places as well as his connection to the community. The interview flowed, and the conversational dynamic between the three made it seem like this gentleman had already been hired. But, then came the kicker. They discussed where he’d be working if he got the job…in a prison. Also in the course of the conversation, questions about safety in the prison while working with inmates and comments about his family commitments came up. As the conversation was winding down, one interviewer asked, “And how about the salary? Are you OK with making $12 an hour?” The interviewee replied, “I am fine with it as long as there is room for growth and opportunities to move up in the company as you had mentioned.” Well said oh young and eager interviewee. The interview came to an end with the interviewee shaking hands with the employers and stating, “I look forward to hearing from you in a couple of days.” The interviewee placed the chair back that he had borrowed from a nearby table and smiled at me on the way out.

Job Search: Scenario 1

I sat at a corner table observing as one young man entered the Starbucks café. He ran into a young woman he knew that was sitting at a table in the middle of the café, who was barely able to focus on what was in front of her. The hellos came and went, then the topic swiftly changed to his new job opportunity that he was just notified about. As he went on and on about this new job, he wandered back and forth from ordering at the counter, grabbing some napkins from the condiment bar, and setting up camp at a corner table close to his friend. He was ecstatic. But, now he had a decision to make, what does he do with the current part-time job he is holding? When does he tell them he is leaving or should he keep it as a part-time job? The young woman listened. After he finally got settled and gave her a chance to speak, she made a comment, “yeah, I’m over here working on my cover letters,” then a nervous laugh erupted.